And so, so true.
Living in Oregon…According to Jeff Foxworthy
THIS IS WHAT JEFF FOXWORTHY HAS TO SAY ABOUT
‘LIVING IN OREGON’…
§ If
someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t work there,
you live in Oregon.
§ If
you’ve worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong
number, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you measure distance in hours, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you have switched from ‘heat’ to ‘A/C’ and back again in the same day, you live
in Oregon.
§ If
you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both doors
unlocked, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without
flinching, you live in Central, Southern or Eastern Oregon.
§ If
you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a 2 layers of clothes or
under a raincoat, you live in Oregon.
§ If
driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow and
ice, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road
construction, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash, you live in
Oregon.
§ If
you know more than 10 ways to order coffee, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you know more people who own boats than air conditioners, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the “Walk” signal, you
live in Oregon.
§ If
you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a
real mountain, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle’s Best, and Dutch Bros,
you live in Oregon.
§ If
you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon, you live in
Oregon.
§ If
you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Clatskanie, Issaquah, Oregon,
Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you consider swimming an indoor sport, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you know that Boring is a city and not just a feeling, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food, you live
in Oregon.
§ If
you never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho, you live in
Oregon.
§ If
you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists, you live in
Oregon.
§ If
you buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old ones after
such a long time, you live in Oregon.
§ If
you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your OREGON
friends, you live or have lived in Oregon.
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